Post by colton ryan mattis on May 26, 2013 12:04:20 GMT -5
{ FEEL IT COMIN' IN THE AIR AND THE SCREAMS FROM EVERYWHERE }
I'M ADDICTED TO THE THRILL
- - - - - - IT'S A DANGEROUS LOVE AFFAIR[/color][/font]
Colton had always been the quiet kind of kids, never speaking unless he had something to say. It was part of his charm, really. In situations where any normal person would be flipping shit, yelling, screaming, punching, generally going ape-shit, Colton was calm, cool, collective and very intimidating because of it. It was almost worse that yelling, to have a calm voice, threatening in a soothing voice. That quality of his helped a great deal with what he did for a living, intimidation at its finest. He faced the burliest of men, the most muscled and yet he had the ability to emasculate without changing the volume of his tone. Colton was triumphant with his skill, especially since it required the least amount of effort on his part. Nothing could get to him with this way of life, and that was something the soldier preferred. Show no weakness, it was pretty much drilled into his skull since he was introduced to his father. But despite adoring the fact that Colton was feared simply by his tactics, he often wondered how life would have been like if things were different. If specific events never occurred, would Colton truly be a Mattis or just another kid with a single mother working three jobs just to support them both.
What if his mother never died? Would he have become the monster he is now? Colton knew the things he had done and things will ultimately do are something that no regular person would ever do and not think that he was a monster. He accepted the fact that he was, it would have been terribly delusional if he had thought otherwise. If there was a God, they sure as hell seemed to over look at how malicious humans were. He doubted the presence of a higher being, if there was one, his mother wouldn’t have died, he wouldn’t have ever become what he has without severe earthly punishment, people would die, and pretty much every catastrophe would exists. What Colton Ryan did know was that what human had was now, picturing life after death was bogus, it was only a false comfort for the family of the dead or the dying; something to make death a little bearable. He didn’t understand why people were so afraid of death; it was an inevitable event, whether it is by a bullet, car crash or ‘natural causes’ whatever that meant. It was one of the few things that were unstoppable, in every sense of the word, for we all were one day closer to our deaths, so why fear such a thing?
However, death had a funny way of completely destroying sanity, of annihilating consistency, something every person need to remain functional. No matter how one could anticipate it, death was still such a shocking thing, sending ramifications through everything one does. It is particularly worse for someone who knows exactly when they will die, like cancer patients, with their doctors saying six month time lines are the best they have. Perhaps it was just better not to know when it was time, not to be able to pin down the little life we all have, that spontaneity take the wheel than have our breathes counted down. But life and death both are less than glamorous, dying with dignity is an illusion, just like that life after death theories, you don’t die with dignity, you live with it. There was a difference, a great one at that. But alas, humans are such a primitive species despite our technologic advances and how science has progressed. We are still savages, but civilized savages with tainted morals to boot. And he, Colton Ryan Mattis, was a part of that civilized savage group, every definition of it. How doomed was civilization, the human populace being capable of such brutality shocked him. Colton shook his head, throwing the thoughts aside as he checked on all his food, putting the eggs on a plate with bacon on the same without them touching. Food touching was very much disgusting. Call it obsessive compulsive, but he could never have food touching on his plate. Some things were exceptions, like potatoes and gravy, they had to touch, but if the gravy or potatoes touched the group of peas, the contaminated peas were never eaten. It just didn’t matter, he couldn’t do it.
this is you thinking !
" this is you speaking ! "[/color]
" this is someone else speaking ! "
words meh tagged No One[ color=800004]notes[/color] YAY food! xD
template PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION[/i][/color][/font][/center]
