everything has changed - - - noah

[rebecca lynn cataudella-owens]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style,width: 350px; padding: 10px; background-image: url(http://i.imgur.com/w6MZf.png);] all I know since yesterday is everything has changed As Bex looked down at the positive pregnancy test, she couldn’t help but feel sick to her stomach. And she was sure it was more than just morning sickness. While she was bent over the toilet, emptying the contents of her stomach, the blonde’s mind was reeling. She was in no way equipped to raise a child. Neither was Noah, for that matter. First of all, both of them were criminals. Sure, Noah covered it up with his police job, but no matter. Bex had been raised by criminals, and while she loved her parents dearly, even she could admit that they hadn’t raised her right. Not to mention the fact that she had seen them both get murdered when she was only fourteen. How could she subject a child to that? Of course, abortion wasn’t a viable option either. Bex had terminated her first pregnancy without Noah’s knowledge, and it had driven the couple apart. She wouldn’t be able to do it with his knowledge either, though. Bex would never admit it to anyone, not even her husband, but the abortion had stuck with her as a choice she would regret for the rest of their lives. So, Bex decided right then that they would have to give the child up for adoption. There just wasn’t any other way. It would be best for all those involved. The baby could go to a nice, loving home, and Bex and Noah could continue their unconventional life style. But she wasn’t so sure that Noah would go for the whole adoption thing. Brushing her teeth and washing her mouth out with mouth wash, Bex left the bathroom and went to lie down on the living room sofa. Jager was by her side in seconds, laying his head on her shoulder, nudging her gently. ”What are we gonna do, buddy?” she asked him softly, reaching up to pat his head. Noah was going to be home from work any minute now, and she was going to have to share the news out loud. Bex felt nauseous again. In this moment, she couldn’t even remember if Noah didn’t want kids as much as Bex didn’t want kids, or if it was just something he had gone along with to appease her. Bex placed a hand gently over her stomach and took a deep breath, blowing it out slowly. It really didn’t matter. The thought of her as a mother was an absolute joke. And a sick one at that. words: 416 - tags: noah - outfit: link

[noah zachary owens]

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WHEN YOU LISTEN TO MY WORDS
I SEE THEM SINKING IN

Noah had always been sure he never wanted kids, he never wanted to bring a life into this world and then royally fuck it up like he knew he was bound to, sure his brother had turned out okay, and sure his little family was the image of perfection but Noah was more like their parents than Aaron ever had been, he had a not so secret dark side, he was a bad person pretty much to his core and he knew he was in no way the right man to ever raise a child. It wasn't just who he was that made his sure it was wrong but his wife too, they were both alike in their ways, both criminals and all of that but most of all they were completely content with how they lived right now, they were happy just them and their animals, their lifestyle could withstand a child being thrown into the mix. All of this said, ever since Bex had the abortion Noah had his doubts about what he would have done had she told him before she went ahead and made the decision herself. Sure he had never wanted kids but when she broke it to him that she had terminated a pregnancy he felt like she had taken something from him that he had never even thought of before, it had nearly torn them apart completely and it had taken him a long time to completely forgive her for it though even he couldn't wrap his head around why. Since the abortion Noah had absolutely no idea where she stood on the idea of kids and he was happy to just not think about it, it wasn't ever going to be a problem then. Well, so he thought.

It hadn't been that long a day at 'work' for Noah, he hadn't been on shift but he had been doing his rounds with his, well he didn't really have a name for them but I suppose you could call them his clients. He was collecting his payment and passing along handy information to a local drug cartel and then he had to pay a nosy fellow cop a visit to lay down the way it was going to go if he carried on snooping around Noah and his activities. They had come to a very good understanding thanks to a little blackmailing and a few threats to said cops family. With that out of the way Noah was free to go home and spend the rest of the day with his wife. He walked through the front door, throwing his keys and his gun lazily on the side counter "Honey I'm home" he joked expecting her to be sat on the sofa with a tall glass of some kind of alcohol in her hand. When he saw her there, just lying down and when he wasn't greeting by his canine companion he knew something was up. He made his way across the room to where they where lay and Jager shuffled a little so Noah could sit down too "What's up?" With about as much concern in his voice and on his face as Noah ever could, he didn't care for many people but for Bex he would to anything and seeing her in this abnormal state worried him.

Words: ish | Status: finished | Muse: meh | Notes: <3 dem

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